Outraged!!!!

I'M OUTRAGED THAT WE HAVE FORGOTTEN THAT WE WERE OUTRAGED!!!! 

No so outraged

I think I'm over outrage when it comes to this industry. I'm just over it. I have come to the conclusion that I have way too many feeling to do what I do. 

Sitting across from people every two weeks for years. Talking,building relationships, learning them..... I become invested in these relationships. So when people just say screw me and go to someone else.....my feelings are hurt. And I'm tired of that. I'm tired of caring what people do. I just want to do my job, get paid, pay my bills, travel and shop and save(not necessarily in that order). 

Guess I'll take the time tomorrow to actively look for a "regular" job. 

I'm not patient

I hate not knowing, waiting for answers. Hate it.  Hate it hate it hate it. 

I woke up this morning on top of the world.  I felt great about life, about love about everything.  I felt one with the universe and all of that.  It was a great feeling.  Even though I often given "overly happy" people the side eye, it felt good.  Really good.  Are there really people that feel like that all the time?

Then it stopped.  And doubt started creeping in, and anxiety and fear and bam.  Bad place.  I don't want to be in a bad place anymore.  I'm tired of the bad place.

I have to be patient.  It'll work out, it always works out.

You know

Whatever happened to if you know better do better?

So you know if you call during business hours there's a good possibility I'm working. I don't answer the phone when I'm working so send a text. I refuse to be held accountable for you not getting. Response if you call and don't follow up with a text. 

Never. Call. 

STFU Asshole

Not wanting smoking around public places (like a stadium) isn't about being a 'treehugger'. It's about I don't want your fucking cigarette smoke infecting the lungs of my family and myself. I don't want your dumb ass to be sitting around in 20 years and I'm dying of fucking lung cancer or emphysema and *I* have never put a cigarette to my lips in my life.

Asshole.

Self employed

The longer I work for someone the more I realize I was meant to work for myself. 

I despise having to ask "if" I can do something. That pisses me off. I miss my freedom and flexibility. Especially because the person I work for has no problem saying screw me and my schedule as long as it benefits her. 

You can't be sick. You can't take care of any business. You can only eat lunch if I do or if you get me something. You can't take your mandatory hour lunch at the end of the day unless you go pick my daughter up. You can't do anything unless it benefits me. 

I miss my own space and time. 

Silence isn't always golden

I find something extremely unsettling about people who compliment people by not saying anything. 

What do I mean you ask? 

"when I don't say anything that's a good thing. " But then can be the most vocal about everything negative. You can't put people down all the time and expect them to go out of their way for you. You have to have more to say to people than what they do wrong. 

You must have some kind of internal struggle if you can't compliment someone. Oh but you expect all the praise. Wait for the fall.